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Holiday Easter 2021 – “Fly” Now!

Overseas holidays are now banned under UK law!

As Easter 2021 approaches, it is now illegal to leave the UK without a “reasonable excuse”.  Anyone who travels to a port or airport with the aim of an Easter 2021 holiday abroad could be fined.

As the government continues to warn Britons against making holiday plans just yet, many people may find their state of mind slipping downwards. After all, it’s not the same without an Easter 2021 vacation or annual summer holiday to look forward to.

So, I’m helping people to travel to their favourite Easter 2021 destination; all from the comfort of their own armchair!

Amid the despair and grief of this pandemic, it might seem silly to focus on holidays, but they undoubtedly play a huge part in our mental health and wellbeing. From the excitement of choosing a destination and accommodation, researching everything from sights to restaurants, to the actual week or fortnight itself followed by the recollection of treasured memories, holidays really do matter.

It’s about ‘life experiences’, relaxation, and most importantly, escapism from everyday life. The coping process of escapism is common to many people in difficult times, and by wanting to still book a holiday, we are actively engaging in escapism behaviour. Escape is key in our mental self-care, and it can be good to seek a happy escape when things seem impossible – that feeling of ‘I just need to get away’.

And of course, many forms of our regular escapisms, such as going out to the gym, bars and restaurants, have been taken away from us, increasing our desire to plan ahead for getaways once lockdown is fully lifted. For now, at least, dining out is weather dependent. And the outlook for Easter weekend and following week is looking bleak.

So, I’m creating a series of downloads to enable people to spirit their minds away to an amazing holiday destination and in doing so, take back a little ofthe relaxation and release they would have enjoyed had they actually been away.

At a time when we can’t access a vacation abroad, something as simple as taking a ‘virtual holiday’ can offer a brief moment of escapism. This allows you an opportunity to wind down and re-energise for Lockdown lifting.

My free downloads are a form of self-hypnosis, and simply require you to sit down in a quiet and comfortable spot, close your eyes, listen to my words, visualise the holiday destination, and relax.

I’ve chosen five types of holiday for the recordings – a paradise island, mountains, safari, road trip, and Disney – to reflect some of the popular destinations we’re missing right now.

I hope you’ll have the opportunity to take a few short breaks in spirit if not in body, over Easter and during the months ahead.

Enjoy, “A Trance to Enjoy Your Paradise Island,” available now.

And, follow the Tanya Bunting Coaching page on Facebook or subscribe to the Tanya Bunting You Tube Channel to access your next virtual vacation to be uploaded shortly.

Wishing you and yours a very Happy Easter 2021.
Tanya x

Misophonia – Sound rage or sensory tsunami?

Recently, I met a new client.

We sat chatting whilst Mum made the tea. The young person chatted freely about Misophonia and was comfortably relaxed until Mum sat down and crossed her legs.

And then, I saw it.

Misophonia that is.

A physical jolt [reflex] to the body that crept up and “hit” hard, with little or no warning!

The emotional state of my patient changed in an instant. Needless to say, having seen “hit” [reflex action], I wasn’t surprised when she let her feelings known.

Consequently, the impact on my patient and her family became a great motivator for me. I was keen to reduce the physical “hit”, as well as the trauma for all involved.

So, what is Misophonia?

Misophonia means “…hatred of sound”. However, sounds are only part of the issue. Actions can be common triggers too!

In the story above, Mum crossed her legs and that’s when things went wrong.

The sounds and actions that trigger Misophonia are voluntary, such as  sniffing, chewing, spitting, crossing legs, licking lips and saying certain words. Involuntary sounds like tummy rumbles or blinking aren’t a problem. Hence, anger rises because the other person [usually a family member] should know better! And disgust arises because of a perceived or potential threat – something that is dangerous and may hurt us.

Like many of us, Misophonia sufferers are apt to be repulsed by the sight and sound of someone eating with their mouth open. However, for them, this causes a powerful urge to stop them or leave!

Like any other perceived or actual threat, Misophonia triggers the fight/flight response. And, is typically accompanied by a rapid heartbeat, shaking, sweating and so on.

So, what is Misophonia and what is the impact?

Talking on Good Morning Britain, Ruth Langsford shared her experience including the frustration caused by her husband’s slurping, tapping and crunching!  Sadly, having lovingly cooked breakfast, she has to leave her husband to eat alone to avoid a domestic!

Kelly Osborne, presenter, told Loose Women shared how she’s even removed gum from other people’s mouths; And, the relief of getting a diagnosis. She’s now learning to cope by recognising and moving away from triggers.

And Franz Kafka [Author] is reported to have become nocturnal. He slept in the day to avoid certain triggers and worked during the night in order to cope!

Many Misophonia sufferers report that they want to hit out following the disgust and/or physical response. And, more and more it seems that people are recognising their symptoms and seeking help.

Treatment for Misophonia in the NHS, UK

Worried about Misophonia? Then, discuss your concerns with your GP.

Whilst Misophonia information is currently pending on the NHS website, I do know of cases where GPs have referred patients to specialists within the NHS Trust for on-going support.

What is Misophonia according to the Misophonia Institute in the USA?

“…Misophonia is a condition where a person has a severe sensitivity to specific soft sounds and visual images. When a person hears the sounds, the person has a very strong emotional reaction such as hate anger, anxiety, rage, and resentment and physiological distress.” Misophonia Institute Website

The Misophonia Institute have worked closely with Chris Pearson, a UK based Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist, to research the impact of Sequent Repatterning Therapy [SRT].

Chris Pearson describes the reflex as a “poke to the body”. Research shows that this physical response varies from person to person. Some people feel it in a limb, whilst others get the “poke” within their head or body.

Treatment for Misophonia – Sequent Repatterning Therapy [SRT]

SRT combines Clinical Hypnotherapy, Parts Therapy and Neuro-Linguistic Programming to effect transformational change.

Sequent Repatterning Training (SRT) is generally effective because it allows a person to feel the physical sensation of the misophonic reflex while not having the emotional response.

SRT builds a strong calming response over a series of sessions. And, then teaches the patient to respond to the physical sensation with a calm response.

How successful is the SRT Treatment for Misophonia?

Research shows that 80% of people who receive SRT get a 70% improvement.

In my experience, this is life changing because the person with Misophonia is gradually able to spend more time with others.  NLP Techniques such as anchoring, enables them to quickly regain a positive emotional state when needed. And, developing a calm default mode is, of course, much better for family life.

The science behind SRT is memory reconsolidating. Like NLP , it works from a premise that we can retrain our brain to respond differently. In a nutshell, Misophonia response memories are deleted and overwritten with a memory [neural pathway] that holds a new and calm response. So, Misophonia patients learn to tolerate the trigger without the emotion [anger, disgust and anxiety].

Treatment for Misophonia – 5 Self-Help Tips:

  1. Talk to people with Misophonia to find out what’s worked for them.
  2. Play background music or white noise to continue to participate in family rituals and social events.
  3. Learn calming techniques that support you to regain your emotional state. 7/11 breathing is a good place to start. You can learn this quickly and easily by listening to the complimentary 4711 Trance available to download from my website or by visiting my YouTube Channel.
  4. Learn mindfulness techniques to support you to manage negative feelings like anger. Top-tip: Accepting your feelings is a highly effective in helping you to calm.
  5. Plan your exit! If you know that a social situation may be challenging, plan and rehearse how to manage it. For example, telling your audience, “I’m just going to take 10, I’ll be back soon”, in order to maintain great relationships and give yourself space.

In Summary…

Misophonia is much more than sound rage. It is an unconscious response [reflex] to a range of triggers that may be visual [observed], auditory [heard]; and more rarely, gustatory [tasted] or olfactory [smelt].

Whether Misophonia is a Sensory Tsunami, is for individual sufferers  to decide.

As a therapist, working with clients to lessen the impact of Misophonia on them is rewarding. Just one of the reasons why I love my job!

Tanya Bunting

Tanya is a Clinical Hypnotherapist, NLP Trainer and Student Liaison Lead for the International College of Clinical Hypnotherapy. She works flexibly as a therapist, coach, teacher/trainer in her hometown [Bournemouth] and wherever her skills and interests take her. Tanya is a named Clinical Hypnotherapist on the Sequential Repatterning Training website and offers a complimentary discovery call if you want to talk about your experience of Misophonia and find out how she can help.

Medical Disclaimer

Always seek the advice of you GP or other qualified healthcare advisor with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition; and, never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have seen on a website.

Hypnotherapy for Children

Children, like grown-ups, can thrive when all of their basic needs are met. As parents, we are tasked with nurturing our children so that they can be their best. NLP and Hypnotherapy for children can help if your child has a fear, habit or behaviour that is holding them back.

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs dates back to 1943 and underpins his theory of motivation. The psychologist, Abraham Maslow, noticed that humans have 5 different kinds of need.

To survive we need:

  • Physiological: Food, water, warmth and rest – Basic needs to survive!
  • Safety: Security and protection – Shelter and resources!

To thrive we need:

  • Social Belonging: Family, friends, colleagues, community – Love, care and support!
  • Self-Esteem: Self-respect and belief – A sense of purpose and passion!
  • Self-actualisation: Living according to one’s full potential – Being the best version of you!

Maslow believed that we work up from the bottom and it’s only when the basic needs have been met that we can move up to the next level.

What if our basic needs aren’t met?

In a nutshell:

  • Physiological: Physical neglect causes a person to perish and is detrimental to health and well-being.
  • Safety: Living in a state of fear causes worry, stress and anxiety; ultimately leading to ill-health and burn-out.
  • Social Belonging: As social beings, a lack of belonging [loneliness] affects emotional well-being and mindset; so, the ability to relate to others is crucial.
  • Self-esteem: Low self-respect and a lack of self-belief compounds anxiety and can lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy that one “can’t” rather than “can”.
  • Self-Actualisation: Inability to meet one’s potential leads feelings of frustration and ultimately failure.

So, what are the issues that Children and Young People face that can be addressed with Hypnotherapy and NLP?

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Need Issues faced by Children and Young People
Self-Actualisation Behaviour Problems, Learning & Exams, Goal Setting & Achievement
Self-Esteem Ego-strengthening & Self-Esteem, Tics & Habits [e.g. Nail biting, Hair Pulling]
Belonging Friendship Issues & Being Bullied, Separation Anxiety
Safety Anxiety, Fears & Phobias, Compulsive Actions & Obsessive Thoughts, Toileting Issues
Physiological Sleeping Difficulties – Getting to Sleep, Staying Asleep, Bad Dreams & Nightmares, Bedwetting

What is Hypnotherapy and NLP? And what is that makes them suitable for Children and Young people?

Hypnotherapy
Hypnotherapy is a solution-based approach that is deliver in hypnosis or trance.

Trance is an altered state of consciousness, when you go inside and relax down to that focused place when you’re not quite sure if you’re awake or asleep. During, hypnosis, a therapist can work with your inner mind to support you to make the changes you seek at an unconscious level. This is a game changer for anyone wanting to change an unconscious behaviour or habit and finds that however consciously they want to stop a behaviour, they still feel an urge or compulsion to do it.

During Trance, the therapist will use a range of techniques that may include but won’t be limited to Suggestion Therapy, Metaphors [Stories] NLP and CBT. Visualisation is also used to train the brain.

Neuro-Linguistic Programming [NLP]
NLP is a whole methodology for change that includes coaching, suggestion, metaphors and some wonderful and easy techniques that support transformational or long-lasting change. A NLPer, will teach you and/or your children to use great techniques to manage your emotional state and to make changes happen at an unconscious level.

NLP and Hypnotherapy for Children and Young People

Clinical Hypnotherapy and NLP Training, for me, were preceded by a 25-year career in primary education and school leadership. So, first and foremost, I’m a teacher. My core purpose was and still is LEARNING!

If you’re a parent or teacher reading this article, I know that I don’t need to tell you that children and young people learn best when they are curious, active and enjoying themselves

Hypnosis and NLP enable our younger and youngest clients to learn great techniques, many of which they can ultimately develop the independence to use by themselves.

In my experience, Children and Young People are open to NLP and Hypnosis and have far fewer misconceptions than adults. They love to imagine and are used to learning through stories, making them great trance subjects.

Some therapy techniques rely on a higher level of maturity, so you are reliant on the flexibility and creativity of a good therapist who knows how to adapt of fine tune the process to be just right for your child or teenager.

Hypnotherapy for Children – Client Stories

In the following stories, I briefly share a few examples of NLP and Hypnosis with children and young people that I’ve had the privilege to work with.

They are included to give you an understanding of some of the issues that I’ve worked with, the processes used and the likely outcomes.

Please be aware that there’s no guarantee with Clinical Hypnotherapy and NLP. However, clinical audits generally show a significant reduction in most symptoms.

Story 1 – NLP for Children on Entry to School

Girl [G], Aged 5, Showing Symptoms of Separation Anxiety
G. was in my reception class. Each day she cried on arrival and was desperate for a family member to stay close by. She would take time to settle but generally enjoyed her school day with the support of a known adult to settle her. This could mean a late start to learning, or a later start to work for Mum or Dad.

On one occasion, G. was so distressed that she ran after her parent when they turned to leave the school gate. At this point, I spoke to the headteacher and parents for permission to use my NLPing skills to help.

The process was simple and the results life changing for the family.

Tanya: What do you want?
G: I want to smile so that Mummy knows that I’m happy at school.
Tanya: So let’s remember a time when you were smiling and feeling the happiest at school.
G: When I was wearing my butterfly wings and I was chasing baby bear in the woods!

Process

  1. G. was then asked to remember playing in the woods and notice that great feeling inside.
  2. Tanya then used NLP Anchoring [Stimulus and Response] so that G. instantly felt smiley and happy on arrival to school because the stimulus response was attached to visual schools that she always saw on arrival.

Outcome

Thereafter, G. came in happily every morning.

Story 2 – Hypnotherapy for Children with Toileting Issues

Boy [B], Aged 11, Toileting Issue [Frequent Urination]
B’s Mum contacted Tanya because he wanted to “wee” every 10-15 minutes. This was adversely affecting learning because he had to leave the classroom [or zoom call] frequently.

B. was also anxious about going out and about unless he knew that he could get to a toilet quickly. The only thing on his mind when going to a friend’s house was, “Where’s the toilet?”

The family were disturbed every night because each time B. got up for the loo, he couldn’t settle back to sleep on his own.

Again the process was simple and life changing for B. and his family.

B. told me that he wanted to be able to play for longer and to sleep without getting up for the loo!

Process

  1. Tanya met with the family and chatted about the issues. The medical profession had confirmed that there was no physical reason for B’s symptoms.
  2. Tanya and B. looked at how the bladder works.
  3. Tanya asked B. to close his eyes and go inside. She then supported B. using Parts Therapy to have a chat with his inner mind, specifically that part of him that wanted to wee so often. Once the part had shared the positive reason for the behaviour, Tanya supported B. to “have a word” with it and negotiate a better way forward. The part agreed!
  4. Trance Work: Tanya then supported B. to build a Control Room in his mind [Visual Metaphor] to increase the capacity of his bladder, visualise it working well and then picture himself enjoying his learning, activities and sleep undisturbed.

Outcome

B. now goes to the toilet at break and lunchtime and enjoys a full night’s sleep. B’s parents bought one of Tanya’s packages so B. also got to help Tanya to compose a bedtime story designed to support him to gradually achieve success with a more varied diet.

Story 3 – Hypnotherapy for Children with Tics and Habits

Girl [G], Aged 8, Childhood Tic [Facial]

G’s Dad contacted Tanya because of a sudden onset tic that occurred after a friendship issue. He wondered how hypnotherapy for children can help.

Tanya met with both parents and the little girl online and the tic occurred for the duration of the call.

We didn’t talk about the actual tic because Mum and Dad were sensibly ignoring it. When the little girl mentioned it, Tanya said that she had noticed and that was one of the things Tanya can help with.

The friendship issue was upsetting and causing anxiety for the young person too.

Process [4 session treatment plan overview]

  1. Tanya taught G. all about how anxiety works and how to stop it in its track using a range of breathing exercises.
  2. Tanya taught G. how to use self-hypnosis to relax and visualise her day going well. This included teach G. how to relax all muscles including the facial tic.
  3. Tanya used NLP anchoring techniques to support G. to manage her feelings better.
  4. Trance work: Tanya used a number of NLP techniques in trance to help G. to feel better about an incident that had occurred with a friend.
  5. Bedtime Story: Tanya and G. chatted about G’s request for a bedtime story. G. had a great imagination and gave Tanya all sorts of ideas to include. Tanya then spent a day composing and recording the bespoke story using the Milton Model [Metaphor]. The story included indirect suggestions to settle the tic whilst G. enjoyed her sleep time adventures.

Outcome

Tic eliminated and young person was able to “move on” from the friendship issue.

Medical Disclaimer

The content in this article is not is not intended to be a substitute for medical/obstetric advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of you GP or other qualified healthcare advisor with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have seen on a website.

Want a Sport’s Mindset? Strategies to Get YOUR Head in Gear!

Do you enjoy a chosen sport? Are you keen to improve your skills? And, are you currently frustrated by the impact of the coronavirus pandemic on your training regime? Here’s a few strategies for you or your team to continue to improve your game during lockdown and beyond.

A few years ago, I was asked to provide a two-hour coaching session for a young lady, who loved her sport but wasn’t sure what mindset coaching was for her.

As we got talking, I was immediately inspired by her success to date. She was within just a couple of years of starting her martial arts training and already competing at a national level! She was clearly passionate, talented and had great skills to exceed in her chosen sport; so, what further advantage could a mind coach have? And, what impact did we achieve?

Well, they do say that, “Sport is 10% physical and 90% mental”. And, everyone knows that not every promising sporting star meets their true potential. So, what is it that enables the elite stars to achieve that sporting edge?

Athletes are well aware of how physical conditioning can affect performance – but how aware are they of MENTAL conditioning? 

Sport is largely about strength in adversity, and that makes it particularly relevant in our current lockdown world. 

Sports coaches are now turning more and more to visualisation techniques, mental strength and positive outlook advice while their athletes are unable to fully address physical concerns during these unprecedented days. 

The power of imagined practice is huge…it reproduces the neurological routes that would occur if we performed the situation in reality” (Fisher, 1986; cited by Jiménez, 2007) 

How can athletes use this period of lockdown to work towards long term success? 

Athletes will be feeling the anxiety of being unable to train as they would wish at this time. Yet, it is a time when they can look to their creativity to prevent any dip in performance. 

Here are a few strategies athletes you can adopt NOW to maintain your success:

  • Awareness of health and physical needs – eat, sleep, purpose, planning. Pay close regard to each in turn. 
  • Develop an appropriate training regimen – maintain a routine, at the same time of day. 
  • Talk to your peers – you are not alone and discussion with others in the same situation will help 

All athletes know – MARGINS MATTER! And, mindset coaching with hypnotherapy and NLP, can open the door to achieve those marginal gains; so that you hone the ability to remain confident, stay motivated and improve stamina. 

As we continued talking, it became apparent that my young and aspiringly elite martial arts competitor’s thoughts were interfering with her game; not least the fact that she had only recently had her 13th birthday and was soon to be competing with girls much older and far more experienced than herself. As she said, the rest of the team grew up on the mat; hence, her belief that her competitors would easily secure their places on the international team, leaving her to stay at home! 

To address this limiting belief, we initially used an NLP Swish Pattern technique that enabled my client to imagine success. We then used NLP Anchoring techniques to ensure that when she stepped on the mat, she would feel in a powerfully emotional state to win. Thereafter, we used an NLP Timeline Technique to take her mind to the moment after she secured her success on the team and then noticed all the resources and steps it would take to get there. All of this was sealed into her unconscious via a nice, relaxing, trance; where she visualised her best performance yet. 

After the session, her mindset had completely changed. She believed in her talents, despite her age and went off to secure her place on the English team, with further mindset coaching to reach her potential. 

Whatever the sport and whatever the level, NLP and hypnosis can give every athlete the extra seconds, strength, centimetres that lay within the margins of where they are now, and where they want to be. Watch the video to find out more: https://youtu.be/k9eXO1fMdlY

Throughout the lockdown, I am making available to my local sports clubs a complimentary, one-hour online, group session to enable them to access the psychological side of their sport. 

Do get in touch on 07985 451650 to arrange a session for your team or squad. Or, to arrange 1:1 coaching to keep your “head in the game”.

How Fear Keeps You Smoking and How to Change It!

If you’re a smoker and worried about the risks around COVID-19 then now would be a good time to think about quitting for good.

It’s a harsh reality that if you’re a smoker you’re more likely to get acute respiratory infections and have a higher risk of those infections becoming severe. There has never been a better time to stop smoking.

But quitting is hard for many, and perhaps particularly so at a time of great stress and when many of our routines have been so suddenly disrupted. Perhaps, like the majority of smokers, the mere thought of stopping fills you with panic.

If you smoke, the mere thought of giving up can fill you with PANIC…Is this YOU?

You have every intention of quitting one day – just not today…

Is this YOU?
You are not alone!

Most smokers continue to smoke for one reason… FEAR!

THE ONLY THING THAT PREVENTS US FROM QUITTING IS: FEAR!

Fear – that you will have to undergo an unknown period of time suffering feelings of deprivation.

Fear – that social occasions will not be quite as enjoyable without a cigarette.

Fear – that you can’t concentrate or be as confident without that crutch.

Fear – that your identity, your personality or your character will change.

Fear – that you will lose the “helpful friend” that helps you cope with stress.

And that quitting may cause you to gain a few pounds.

And here’s the news…

That fear of giving up is actually CREATED by cigarettes.

You never decided to fall into the nicotine trap! But nicotine is designed to ensure that you remain there. And, you need to be motivated to break free.

You can take some small steps towards a nicotine-free life. A rehearsal for the time when you can give up smoking for good!

  1. Make a list of the reasons to quit -There are probably a number of them – but have you ever actually written them as a list?
  2. Set a quit date and stick to it!
  3. Change your brand -ONE week before your quit date – change your brand of cigarette. You will find they are not as enjoyable.
  4. Try to change the hand you use to hold your cigarette It will feel awkward – but this small change breaks down habits and associations.
  5. Change your routine – If you normally smoke after a meal, try to break out of this routine. Try reading a chapter of a book, watch a TV show, or retreat to a part of the house where you wouldn’t normally smoke.
  6. Get active – A five-minute walk or stretch produces chemicals in the brain that reduce cravings.
  7. Positivity! Make regular affirmations to yourself several times a day “I am enjoying life as a non-smoker”

Hypnotherapy can help you to have your last cigarette ever!

It will show you the reasons to stop can help your:

  • Motivation to stop smoking
  • Break the connections or triggers to smoking
  • Feel positive about becoming a non-smoker

So, if you haven’t been able to quit smoking before, that doesn’t mean you won’t be able to do it now!

How to Sleep like a Baby in 7 Simple Steps

Over the last couple of weeks, I’ve noticed more and more people talking about the changes in their daily routine. I must admit that the freedom to stay in our pyjamas and work from the bed or sofa does seem attractive, but for those that are now struggling to sleep at night, there’s been a need to think again.

The current pandemic has affected many of our daily routines, and one of its biggest impacts reported is the detrimental effect on sleep.

Many people are suffering from sleep issues for the first time in their lives. They know that concerns over the impact of the Covid 19 virus are to blame but haven’t yet found their own strategy to resume a good night’s sleep. Instead, they report difficulties in falling to sleep easily, waking for long periods, feeling groggy and achieving less the next day and feeling irritable. To name but a few!

The NHS notes that in the long term, poor sleep puts you at risk of serious medical conditions, including obesity, heart disease and diabetes; and ultimately, can shorten life expectancy.

The good news is that you can quickly adjust your routine to include effective strategies that will support you and your family to settle easily and achieve a better night’s sleep.

Find out my 7 simple mind hacks for a calmer and better sleep in my article below.

Read More

Ride the Wave – A Trance to Plan for Certainty in Uncertain Times

As you know, the world is the grip of a global pandemic.

Storm Covid19 has hit, and, as a result, our current plans have come crashing down.

You may be feeling worried, unsure about what the future holds.

You may struggle to keep anxious thoughts at bay.

You may even be feeling frustrated, thinking there was more time available to you right now; yet in reality, the tide is rising, those things you wanted to achieve are drifting out of reach.

The good news is, help is at hand. You can take control of your thoughts, so that you point your mind is set on where you want to go.

Clearing the Fog – A Hazy Future found to be Scarier than Physical Pain!

A recent study shows that the uncertainty of something bad about to happen, is more stressful than being sure that something bad is happening.

The London researchers [Archy de Berker et al, 2016] found that volunteers that were told they would definitely receive an electric shock, whilst playing a venture game, felt calmer and were measurably less agitated than those that were told they had less than a 50% chance of receiving an electric shock. In a nutshell, the level of uncertainty correlated with the level of stress.

So, until the fog evaporates, and we can see clearly, one way or another that something bad will definitely happen, the stress is higher.

So, what happens?

If we can’t neutralise a perceived threat, some of us are apt to worry [catastrophize], whilst others are able to establish a sense of calm amongst the story seas.

Hardwired to Survive

The result of catastrophizing [thinking and talking about the worst that could happen], triggers our primitive survival instinct – the fight or flight response. Questioning what may be, how we should or could respond, running through the different outcomes in our minds [impact on life, business, loved ones] leads to unwanted feelings such as anger, frustration and possibly even aggression. Instinctively, we may want to run away and hide, or stand up and fight.

The Impact of Stress on our Health and Immunity

Since the 1970s, researchers [starting with Carl & Stephanie Simonton] have found that worrying and imagining the worst ailments is detrimental to overcoming an illness, and conversely expecting and visualising recovery can lead to quicker healing and even remission, in some thought to be terminal cases.

The Impact of Stress on Moving Forwards with the Practical Things in Life

If the current uncertainty, has affected your ability to focus and achieve, you may be pleased to know that the same principles [visualisation & expectation] can be used to apply to our behaviours, as our health. You may have heard it said, that, “…the person who does not know where they’re going, always travels further”, and if the current circumstances are holding you back, the trance [relaxation download] that accompanies this article is designed to support you to program your brain to do what you want it to do. With Neurolinguistic programming [NLP] and hypnosis, we teach our clients to program their unconscious [akin to programming a computer] to rewire their brain [via visualisation and positive suggestion] to complete tasks in waking time, that previously they were finding more difficult.

So, what is it that you can do to rise above the fog of uncertainty?

People who are able to mitigate against the impact of stress caused by uncertainty, in order to maintain control, focus and plan ahead, often use simple techniques that we can do naturally to weather the storm and continue to steer their own destiny amidst the chaos.

The following list is a “pick and mix” recipe for your success. Choose what’s right for you:

  • Awareness is your superpower: Notice the impact of your thoughts on feelings.
  • Notice the worry story you may be telling yourself and switch your focus to notice to realise the positive aspects of the current situation.
  • Accept uncertainty and focus on the aspects of your life that you can control; a project, assignment or something else [e.g. DIY, cooking, gardening, studying, writing, etc]

Stand up to the Stress or Anxiety of Uncertainty with some Mood Boosters:

  • Exercise and movement
  • Meditation, relaxation, self-hypnosis
  • Goal orientated activity

Or, something else that you find pleasant or fun.

And, if you know you’ve been procrastinating and want to achieve whatever it is that you haven’t done yet, my giveaway this week, a “Trance to Plan for Certainty,” is designed to accelerate your success. Listen daily for optimum success. Ask others not to disturb you and find somewhere comfortable where you can sit or lie down. Caution: Be sure not to drive or operate machinery whilst listening to this trance.

COVID 19 = Progress

Lazy Lockdown or Constructive Covid-time? 5 easy steps to accelerate your personal progress…

If I told you that more time is available to achieve what you want in these unusual times, I wonder how interested you’d be?

At the end of our second week of isolation in the UK, I’ve noticed the ever-changing content and tone of our social media posts.

If like many, you’ve “enjoyed” consecutive pyjama days despite the challenges of working from home, whilst juggling home schooling or even rearranged you homelife to fulfil your keyworker role and keep your own family safe, the following strategy is to ensure that you get some time for YOU by getting up a little earlier and developing a few simple, yet life changing habits. In the first instance, you may think twice but
when you realise the benefits to be had, I think you’ll agree you’re worth it.

Initially on social media, there was a lot of camaraderie between key workers and the communities they serve; followed by requests to keep supporting not just our key workers in hospitals, schools and beyond but also EVERYONE that’s supporting our food chain [from the farmers to the plate] as well as the refuge collectors, the post people and those shop assistants that are working hard to ensure a continued sense
of normality, not to mention our basic needs.

Our keyworkers are getting up and out, as usual, whilst the rest of us stay at home and post about our new routines – staying in our pyjamas, leading home schools and taking our businesses online; as well as great aspirations for how we can use the extra time. Some of you, I notice, plan to write a book, develop an online course or other new product; learn to play an instrument or increase your exercise – to name but a few of the goals I’ve read, so far…

Now, I’m sure that I don’t need to tell you that every new venture starts with a thought. Disney himself noted, “If you can dream it, you can do it”, but if you ask yourself now whether you’re using your time as well as you can, I wonder how many of you have slipped into a semi-holiday mode, or opted for more duvet than action. Maybe, you’re still adjusting to a new way of life and maybe you’re ready to adapt your daily routine to make the biggest difference to you.

A year or so ago, I read Hal Elroyd’s best seller, “The Miracle Morning” and since reading it I gradually tweaked the start of my day to achieve so much more. It was going really well until five months ago when I became a full-time parent/carer again when 24-year-old [a beautiful young lady with Down Syndrome] flew back to our nest. Initially, she needed lots of TLC and personal care, so I gave myself permission to drop down a gear or two in driving my new business, until I reached a point when I realised enough is enough. Suddenly, we were a few months into family living again and whilst I’d continued seeing clients and teaching online, my creativity in terms of creating new products had slowed right down. I was running the risk of putting the publication of my first personal development book on hold for the foreseeable future. When I asked myself if that was what I wanted, my reply was of course, a BIG, FAT, “NO”!

Richard Bandler, Co-creator of NLP, teaches his students that it’s when we get to the point of enough is enough, that we’re really ready to change. So, if there’s something you really want to achieve in your “Covid-time” that is at risk, I wonder what it will take to make it happen.

If like me, a routine makes all the difference, you may want to get up earlier and give yourself time to prepare well for your day so that you achieve your goals seamlessly and stay on target during unusual times.

The strategy that I share with you today is not only inspired by Hal Elroyd’s “Miracle Morning” but also one of the presuppositions of NLP that as humans we all have the resources inside to make the changes we want to make. There are no spoilers for you if you decide to read Hal Elroyd’s publication of start your own NLP journey; rather more, it gives you my sequence that you can follow or adapt to work for you. And to keep it current, I’ve aptly used the acronym COVID to inspire you to make the most of your COVID time and realise so long as you’re safe and well, there’s no time like the present to use the following five steps or create your own sequence to success. So, my invitation to you is simple. Get up an hour earlier and follow the acronym C.O.V.I.D, to enjoy time for YOU and lay the best foundations for another productive day.

Since I reinstated my wake-up routine, I haven’t looked back. My first book is nearing publication and the accompanying online course and trance download are well underway, as well as other new products in the pipeline. I’ve adjusted to seeing clients from home via the Zoom Room and the newness of our changing circumstances already feels familiar.

1. Calm – Enjoy a calm start to your day; silence and nothing else [5 minutes]

Keep Calm and Carry On was a motivational poster produced by the British government in 1939 in preparation for WW2. The poster was intended to raise the morale of the British public who were in fear of the impact of mass air attacks. This week, I’ve lost count of the references to Keep Calm and Corona On and I’m wondering if people realise the important message behind each catch phrase.

Put simply, fear of COVID 19 or anything else activates sympathetic nervous system [SNS]. This is called the Fight or Flight response. Blood flow to the brain and muscles is increased, whilst blood flow to non-essential muscles & is decreased. The adrenal glands are activated to provide us with the energy. If this happens too often, increased levels of adrenaline and cortisone is detrimental to health and well- being. A calm default mode via the parasympathetic nervous system [calming techniques] counteracts this and helps to keep you well.

Research shows that any mindful meditation produces the happy hormones Serotonin and Dopamine. So, go inside, slow down your breathing and enjoy the silence. You can simply breathe in for 7 and out for 11, and notice that on each out breath you relax even more until your breathing settles and you’re aware of that slow and low belly breathing that occurs at the edge of sleep.

2. Orate – Tell yourself what you want, why you want it and how you are achieving it [5 mins]

Every successful coach will tell you that success depends on busting limited beliefs and ensuring that success for the individual is right on every Logical Level [Robert Dilts].

As NLP coaches, we teach our clients to program their brain to ensure the positive beliefs, attitudes and behaviours that will propel them to achieve their goal. You can do this simply by answering a few simple questions in relation to your goals.

  • What do you want for yourself and others? [Goal/mission]
  • Who are you in relation to your goal? [Identity]
  • What is your belief in relation to your goal? [Values/Why]
  • What skills do you have and how are they supporting you [Capabilities]
  • What are you doing reach your goal? [Behaviour/Actions]
  • Where, when and with whom do you work to achieve this [Environment]

Be sure to affirm each statement in the positive as your unconscious doesn’t process negation. If you state, don’t waste time. It will hear the command, waste time. For example:

  • I am an author whose publications help others.
  • I’m sharing my knowledge so that other people can learn new skills to achieve success

And so on…

3. Visualise – Close your eyes, plan your schedule and see yourself doing well

As NLPers and hypnotists, much of our “magic” comes from enabling our clients to rehearse their success in trance, prior to any activity. This is because your brain doesn’t know the difference between real life and role play. However, when imagine your success your brain thinks it’s already achieved it. Thereafter, in a waking state, you’ll access a flow state and achieve them easily. Top tip: Decide what state you want to be in for each activity. Remember a time when you were in that state. See what you saw, hear what you heard and feel how you felt. Give that feeling a name [e.g. colour] to glue it in your brain. This NLP anchoring technique will enable you to quickly re-access this useful state when you need it.

4. Invigorate – Exercise, freshen up and get dressed! [30 mins]

The benefit exercise is well known, and I know I don’t have to tell you how good it feels to give your energy a boost. Aerobic exercise [walking, running, rowing, jogging] supports a healthy cardiovascular function also triggers the production of endorphins [happy hormones]. The rhythm of continuous exercise or dancing, as well as singing [in the shower or elsewhere] boosts the flow of those feel good hormones. So, if you want to feel happy, as Dr Richard Bandler would say, “Why wait?”

And now back to the pyjamas…

Recent research shows that dress can affect the quality of both thinking and production! So, get out of those comfies and dress for the task in hand.

5. Downtime – Read or write without a screen! [20 mins]

The definition of downtime, according to the Cambridge dictionary is, noun: the time during which a machine, especially a computer, is not working or is not able to be used.

Many of you have posted that your using you plan to use your time on isolation to catch up on reading and that may well be happening in practise but wouldn’t it be wonderful to establish a schedule that enables you to read and write early in the day both now and when the current pandemic is behind us.

I started writing journal writing a few years ago, when my own life was turned upside- down for a while. The reflections [ideas, breakthroughs, successes, opportunities, learnings and realisations] proved invaluable; not to mention the fact that when you “park” a thought that’s been worrying you, you can interrupt any negative internal dialogue and turn your attention to the positives. Many people like to keep a gratitude journal, which may prove interesting now when it may be harder to source the things that may previously have been taken for granted.

Finally, enjoy time for you at the start of every day for the duration of Covid 19 and beyond…

Warmest wishes
Tanya

Take 10 for YOU!

At the end of our first week of self-isolation here in the UK, it’s been a joy to experience the gratitude given to carers and teachers for the huge role they play in our lives on a daily basis, let alone the massive sacrifices being made to support our communities during the Coronavirus pandemic.

Much of the praise for teachers comes from parents who have unexpectedly stepped into their own home “classrooms” overnight and juggled their working life [or sudden lack of work] with leading their own “home school”, albeit with support from schools, each other, and the endless resources online. Likewise, much of the praise for parents comes from the teachers who like our NHS staff are putting their own families at risk to continue teaching in the workplace or establishing their own strategy for ensuring continuity and progression in learning from a distance. So today, I’m wondering…

  • Are you a parent, a teacher or both?
  • Has your daily routine changed dramatically?
  • Do you feel that you need to be everything to everyone to get you and yours through these unprecedented times?

If you’ve answered “Yes” to all three questions, it may be time to give yourself permission to do things differently for a while.

Find out about our ‘Take 10 for YOU’ steps and improve your day to day life in self isolation. Enjoy it and encourage your children [at home or at school] to do the same.

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4 Magical Questions to elicit “I can…”

I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve heard adults and children say, “I can’t”!

“I can’t read!”

“I can’t write this job application/report!”

“I can’t speak in public!”

I wonder how often you hear yourself say, “I can’t”, and what this phrase means to you?

The TV Programme, “Can’t Cook, Won’t Cook” springs to mind and if you’ve watch it, you’ll know that everyone cooked in the end, didn’t they?

As parents, teachers, team leaders or coaches, our response is crucial if we’re to support others to accelerate progress towards their goals. Whenever anyone says, “I can’t”, they may be thinking:

  • I don’t have the skills
  • I don’t believe I can
  • I’m not sure I can do it well enough
  • I’m not sure what other people will think

You can find out what you can ask to provide a great strategy to take someone from their problem state to their desired state. Read the full article here to find out the next steps in NLP.

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