Tanya Bunting

Best tips for sticking to your New Years Resolution

Following on from last week’s email, we’re now a good two weeks into 2023.

This means that if our New Year’s Resolutions included changing a habit, we’re already halfway towards reprogramming our brains and yet research shows that after two weeks, only 71% of those who set a goal on 1 st January are still successful at keeping it. So, if you’re in the 29% of people on route to success, I’m curious to know your strategy because I may want to borrow it!

NLP Strategy Elicitation is a great skill that certified NLP Practitioners love to use two reasons:

Firstly, it’s a good or effective strategy, you can apply it to another aspect of your life, where you want to improve.

Secondly, if it’s a bad strategy, you can learn how to mess it up and put something far more effective in its place.

Alternatively, it you know the trigger/cue for a particular behaviour the NLP Swish Pattern is one you can learn quickly and lead for yourself.

  1. Think of the cue image you want to replace [e.g. Someone offers you a cigarette]
  2. Make that image big and bright.
  3. Insert a small image of how you want to be instead, down in that left hand corner.
  4. Mentally swish [SWOP] that image. Repeat 5 or 6 times.

Top Tip: Your brain learns quick, so work fast!

You can “Swish” to move from procrastinating to working hard, eating rubbish to a healthy meal, ignoring the alarm to being up with the lark or whatever you want to do to shine brighter. If you want to join the 9% who consistently and insistently meet their goals, click on the Shine NLP link below.

Dissolving Discomfort with NLP Spinning Feelings

One thing that I love, love, LOVE about NLP is that it’s a generic skill set that can be applied to all sorts of personal and professional situations. 

This week, I’m excited to share a great technique that’s super simple to learn. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you can reverse unwanted feelings, so that you can instantly feel better? 

I wonder if you know that a feeling or an emotion can is simply energy moving.

Dr Bandler, co-creator of NLP, notes that it’s, “E-MOTION or energy [electricity] in motion”. 

And the great news is that when you interrupt and reverse it, it loses its negative charge.

Dissolving Discomfort 

  1. Think of something that puts you out of your comfort zone; remember what you see, hear, feel when you’re anxious, uncomfortable, or nervous [e.g., Meeting someone new, public speaking, walking into an interview].
  2. Notice the feeling inside your body. Where does it start? How does it move? Which direction does it spin? [*Clockwise? Anti-clockwise? Forwards? Backwards?] 
  3. Use the power of your mind to slow the feeling down. Notice how you can make it STOP!
  4. Now, spin it the other way and notice that discomfort dissolve.

*Top-tip: To realise this easily, imagine a clock on your tummy with number 3 to your left and number 4 to your right. Then, spin your hand in the four directions and sense which spin “fits” best with what you’re feeling inside.

This simple strategy can be used to manage nausea and even a headache. How wonderful is that!

Planning for your next week

Can you believe that we’re already a good week into 2023?

The first week of 2023 is already behind us and its already time to plan for the week ahead.

I wonder if you know that 23% of people who set New Year’s resolutions quit in the first week and only successfully keep their New Year’s resolutions in the longer term.

Maybe, that’s why Bill Gates, Co-founder of Microsoft, believes, “Everyone needs a coach… We all need people who give us feedback. That’s how we improve.”

Today, I’m really excited to share some of my best top tips for success to support you to keep shining throughout 2023, as well as to let you know that we’ve extended our New Year “NLP Practitioner” Offer until midnight on Sunday 15 th January.

  1. Put time into planning YOUR success – Include your goal, the actions needed and schedule when you will complete those actions on a daily basis.
  2. Make sure that your goals are right on every NLP “logical” level – your core purpose, identity, values and beliefs, skills, behaviour, environment. If your goal is at odds at any logical level, you’re likely to find that the odds are against you.
  3. Be sure to focus on your goals daily – Success is 20% skill; the rest is mindset. An easy way to plan success is to check your schedule the night before and visualise your success as you’re waking up in the morning.
  4. Be flexible – if an action slips, adjust your schedule and complete it at the next best opportunity or adjust and do things differently. For example, if something happens and you miss your gym slot, complete a home workout out instead.
  5. Watch, listen and learn from the best! In NLP we call this modelling. Think of someone you admire who has a great strategy for achieving a similar goal and notice what they do that makes the biggest different and imitate it.
  6. Be inspired by the best – Whether you decide to read a personal/professional development book or listen to a daily podcast, find the inspiration that works for you.

Find out more about NLP training in Bournemouth. We teach you the basic skills and how to put them together to effect change and achieve success.

Happy New Year from Tanya Bunting Coaching!

 Let’s reflect on your hopes and dreams for 2023. If you were to get onto your own New Year’s Honours List this time next year (or even be recognised by Charles the King!), what do you want and most importantly, what do you have to do.

The following questions will help you create a Well-formed Outcome for the year ahead.

  • I wonder what you it is you want.
  • What will achieving that goal or goals give you?
  • How will you know when you’ve got it?
  • I wonder what you’ll see, hear, smell, even taste? And, best all of, I wonder how great you’ll feel inside. Imagine it now…
  • What needs to happen for you to get there? Write a list of the actions you need to take. Include the big leaps forward and the tiny steps in between.
  • What can you start doing? Stop doing to speed up the process?

Then, each day, take a few moments to plan forwards…

  1. Imagine yourself achieving your goal once again.
  2. See your day going well…completing the small steps towards success.

When you visualise, you train your brain to go in the right direction. NLP Practitioners aren’t given a wand when they get their license, but it can feel like it when you accelerate progress towards your goals.

When you think about it, IMAGINATION is the one thing that successful people have in common. Would our Lionesses have got onto the New Year’s Honours List without their goal. Did they picture losing? Probably not!

As you move forward in 2023, my invitation to you is to enjoy time for you to actively plan your success. If you’d like to know more about NLP training and what’s in it for you, watch our video below. 

An advent trance for you – re-energise and feel good.

This week, I’m super excited to share Week 2 of our Shine NLP Advent Calendar.

I wonder if you, like me, like to enjoy a surprise from time to time, or maybe you prefer to surprise someone else. Surprises come in all shapes and sizes, do they not?

Last week, not only did my mum win a Christmas raffle but she won a prize to surprise us all…So now we’re looking forward to a family date at the pantomime.

This week, I got a surprise when my neighbour who brought me a Poinsettia to say thank you, simply because I decided to surprise a few friends with a pre-Christmas drink and pamper.

A year or so ago, I decided to learn about the laws of the universe. The law of cause and effect, also known as the law of karma states, that any action causes a reaction… So, whatever you put out—good or
bad—you get right back.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if each time you listen here/hearing my voice, you give yourself a gift to re-energise and feel good, so that you can be at your best to enjoy the festivities and surprises ahead…

So, here is this week’s surprise for you to enjoy the gift of trance on me!

“An Advent Trance for YOU” was inspired by the huge range of advent calendars I’ve seen around this year.

I wonder what you’ll find as you listen in and prepare to shine even brighter during the week ahead.

Your advent calendar starts now – an NLP inspired gift

It’s advent and I was thinking how advantageous it will be to enjoy an advent calendar just for you.

Advent, comes from the Latin word “adventus” or “coming” and Christmas is Coming very soon, isn’t it?

So, as Christians around the world get ready once again to celebrate Jesus’s birthday, I was thinking that there’s no time like the present to present you with a gift to shine even brighter on the run up to the big day. And, here it is…

And each Sunday throughout advent I’ll include an NLP inspired gift for you to enjoy, as well as some selfcare tips for the week ahead.

This week’s gift is 4711 Breathing, a 10-minute trance for you to take time out for you to relax during the Christmas rush.

I wonder if you’ve noticed that at Christmas time, we seem to fall into two camps. Those people who are organised and prepared well in advance, and those of us who despite our best efforts leave present buying and other preparations to the last minute.

On our Licensed Practitioner of NLP, we talk about people who are “in time” and those that are “through time”.

In a nutshell, “in time” people live life in the present, hence why they’re apt to be late because they’re always living in the moment; whereas “through time” people look at the future and prepare for what’s happening next. Consequently, they’re the people that are likely to turn up early and no doubt have their presents gift wrapped already!

My invitation to you this week is to be like a “through time” person and schedule time for you, and to enjoy being “in time” and enjoy the special moments that you want to savour in the festive season.

How to distance yourself from any situation

I wonder how you’ve been feeling this week, and whether there were any negative emotions or thoughts playing on your mind.

Sometimes, when we’re dealing with a situation our thoughts and feelings can get too much and you may feel you want to step back.

This week, our family pulled together to support a younger family member with an unexpected spell in hospital. The symptoms were uncomfortable and daily blood tests, canula fittings and other investigations were too much to bear from time to time.

NLP Dissociation is a great strategy if ever you find yourself feeling that you need to get some distance from a situation and the associated feelings of being in the moment. It’s simple and effective to use on yourself or when you’re supporting others. Here’s how:

  1. Think of a negative situation or feeling that you want to get some distance from, e.g. fear, despair, anger.
  2. Sit quietly and imagine floating your mind up and out of your body and notice what changes.
  3. Up there, looking down on yourself you can simply enjoy the distance for a while. That is to say, see yourself going through the experience without the associated or physical feelings.

For our family member, the suggestion to take her mind up in the aeroplane and be back enjoying a recent journey was enough of a dissociation for the medical profession to complete a procedure.

Dissociation is literally a mind/body split and there are lots of ways to achieve that distance. So, this week my invitation to you is to notice your feelings and choose whether to float your mind up, physical step back and park the emotion physical in space or imagine it on a screen in front of you and use the power of your mind to push it into the distance. As it disappears on the horizon the feelings will decrease dramatically too.

Wishing you a wonderful week ahead and if by chance you feel the need to get some distance from a situation, do remember to float your mind up, or push the situation off and away so you give yourself the opportunity to rekindle your shine.

Enjoy your paradise island from anywhere with NLP

Did you know that we need a good 20 minutes sunshine on our skin to get enough D3? 

And, the Serotonin we produce in the sun turns to Melatonin at night but only if you sleep in the dark. So, lights out for a good night’s sleep.  

Now, when the sky is grey, it can be so much harder to get your shine on, can’t it?

But, with hypnosis you can go anywhere you like in your mind an enjoy the sun anytime, any place, anywhere! So, if “A Trance to Enjoy Your Paradise Island” appeals, the download is a gift to you. 

Hypnosis is another skill that you learn on our Licensed Practitioner of NLP Course. And, 20 minutes in trance is equivalent to 3-4 hours sleep, so enjoy a trance on me! 

Get Your Shine with NLP Nominalisations

I wonder how you found your shine this week. Maybe, you can remember it now…

My shine was spotted by a business networking colleague, who said:

“You’re wearing some really cool new clothes, Tanya. Looking good and great energy today!””
“I’ve got my shine on,” I joked and accepted the compliment albeit none of my clothes were new!

In NLP terms, your “shine” is a nominalisation. Nominalisations are one of the Meta Model language patterns you learn on our Licensed practitioner of NLP course. These magical patterns are great if you want to understand how you or your team [family or colleagues], clients or others are thinking in order to affect success. Change workers, like me, love nominalisations because they’re magical words that tell us where to begin our work and they can be great if you want to motivate your team.

So, what is nominalisation? In a nutshell, nominalisations are verbs or adjectives that have been turned into a noun. People use them all the time and so long as your playful you can have all sorts of fun with them and support your own or others’ success.

You may hear: My anxieties are playing me up!
And say: Give them to me, I love to play!

Or: I’ve lost my sparkle!
And reply: I wonder where you left it.

Or even: I’ve got no motivation!
And reply in jest: Well, go and get some. Here’s the money!

But, as you know, you can’t put motivation in your shopping trolley however hard you try!

Nominalisations hide the action or behaviour but when you ask the right question, people realise the negative behaviours they need to stop and the positive actions that need to start. The wonderful thing is that when you turn any of these words back into a verb, you can instantly go from feeling stuck to feeling momentum again.

You don’t have to have anxieties that are playing up or have lost your sparkle to play along. Just notice what happens when you answer the questions below:

  • What do you do to feel anxious? [To be anxious]
  • What are you doing when you sparkle? [To sparkle]
  • How do you know when you’re being motivated? [To be motivated or to motivate]

    By now, you’ll know I wasn’t actually wearing my shine, but I was using lots of skills from NLP toolkit when I received that compliment…quickly building rapport and spinning a great state.

    My invitation to you this week is to listen up and when you hear a nominalisation, ask a question to support you or others to change their thinking.

    Remember, remember the 5th of November…

    So says the first line of John Milton’s 1926 poem that celebrates the failed gunpowder plot to blow up parliament.

    Benjamin Franklin, one of the Founding Fathers of the USA said, “If you fail to plan, you’re planning to fail”.

    This morning, Saturday 5 th November, I woke up early, heard the rain, felt a chill, and snuggled back under my duvet. I really wanted to go for a workout and a swim but outside the weather was cold and wet, in preparation for a typical Guy Fawkes’ Night!

    Today, on Day 6 of a Licensed Practitioner of NLP course, we’ve been talking about metaprograms, those unconscious patterns of behaviour that run in the background without us really having to think about them.

    The Carrot and a Stick metaphor is a great example of a metaprogram and there’s plenty more when you decide to learn NLP. Will the donkey/employee be inclined to move towards the carrot or away from the stick?

    As humans, we may move towards pleasure/rewards in certain contexts and away from pain in others. If your metaprograms serve you well, that’s great but if your instinct has a detrimental impact on your life, it’s worth recognising and finding a new course of action.

    Lying in my bed, listening to the rain, I may have been tempted to have a lie-in, moving away from the cold and the rain. For me, the urge to get moving “won” because I love that feeling when you’re out of puff and those good endorphins are running high! If honest, it wasn’t just my towards pattern that got me to the gym. Self-hypnosis also did the trick! I imagined lifting slightly higher weights and doing more reps, and blow me down I did!

    My invitation to you this week is to notice what you move away from or towards to. If your metaprogram is working for you, go with it. If not, STOP, THINK & PLAN to succeed and remember the power of your imagination!

    While Guy Fawkes and Co. did plan to succeed, they were caught in the act! If you’re going to get “caught”, wouldn’t it be great to ensure that your metaprograms are working well for you and yours. And imagine how great it will be when you can recognise how others are “wired” so that you can respond or support them accordingly.